I didn’t have Internet for 3 days… sorry for no posts!
I got new carpet installed in the hizzy Friday morning… so the installer guys had to unplug all the wires, etc. in the office. Which means I would have the task of re-plugging them back in… whenever I felt like it, of course.
So, I didn’t have WIFI for a few days…
Yeah, so new carpet all over the house. It’s BEAUTIFUL!
Or it was.
Phizz decided new carpet meant that it was time to get sick again. Now beautiful new carpet is stained.
Poop stained Mohawk carpet.
I had 2 full days of a glorious home. Now it’s over.
Stain-free carpet was short-lived
I saw it and did 3 things: 1) cried 2) gagged 3) barfed (sick for many reasons)
I feel like such a fool for getting the house recarpeted. I guess I had more faith in this dog. I was so excited to have Nate come home from his deployment to a clean, fresh home with doting puppies and a muscled wife.
But, no.
The wind has been taken out of my sails once again. I’m a polly-positive idiot who is trying to make everything look perfect when it’s not.
I just waste time, money and energy.
What’s wrong with me that I’m struggling to love this dog unconditionally?
Am I broken?
——–
OK – so not very badass. I apologize. I am honest and live with my heart on my sleeve. Even if it’s a broken and confused heart.
Question:
Loving Phizz is difficult… Which makes me ponder – Do you love something despite it’s flaws? Because you know they need you more than you need them? Hanging on – hoping that your consistency and loyalty changes them?
Or do you love what is easy… a love that has no drama (or blog-fodder?) A love that is clean and pure and simple?
Gosh, I wish I had good advice here.
I don’t think it’s as much a question of loving here, as it is how much you can endure for what you love. It’s possible to love things that aren’t healthy for you.
Sometimes you need to hedge your losses, cut and run. Other times you have to give it one more chance, one more try to see if there is anything else you can do to make the situation good. Everyone’s been in this situation with other people before, I think – a relationship that isn’t working, etc. I mean, what would you do if every time I came over to your house, I shit on the floor and ate your panties? If it kept happening, no matter what you tried to stop it, you’d probably stop letting me come over (you might also call a psych ward).
I think the hardest part here is that to give up on Phizz pretty much means a death sentence for her since it’s doubtful that she’ll find another home as patient as yours, and that is why you’re having a hard time giving up on her. There’s also a stigma against giving up an animal. Not to mention that you’re not the type to give up on anything/one easily.
I have a feeling that you’ll figure something out. Maybe things will be easier with Nate home, since he might be more intimidating to Phizz… or maybe he’ll figure out who’s been giving Phizz her crack and cut her off from her dealer.
Vinegar works wonders on pet stains. Just pour some on the stain. Wait a few minutes, and blot like crazy. Repeat as necessary. Yes, your house will smell a little like pickles for a few days, but that fades and it really works to lift the stain. Plus, its very economical when you have a dog like Phizz.
I think God discusses this subject a time or two…not about poopy carpets but about loving unconditionly. It’s easy to love those who are easy to love. Who knows, maybe Phizz came into your life to help you learn to love those whom you don’t think you can. True and honest love transends your personal needs and wants. I think to truly get Christainity is to love with a God kind of love, a love that is full of mercy and grace.
Despite all the ‘love’ talk in the comments, which is nice, I will offer my two cents. Since I have been working with animals professionally for more than 20 years, I would say that there are times when you have done everything you can do to help a dog. Although Phizz is a sweet dog, you may have to break down and admit that maybe your home is not the best fit for her needs. A dog her size needs LOTS of exercise and room to run. Alot of her antics may be based on that fact. She’s bored and dogs will do all sorts of distructive things when they’re bored and not exercised enough. That is not to say you are a bad mommy. Some people’s schedules just can;t accomodate this type of dog. All of us who read your blog KNOW you love this dog. One option would be to try to find someone with a farm in NC who would be willing to take her. I find that those situations work best for these dogs. They are able to run around all day and stay occupied with horses and stuff and can get it out of their system and drop dead at night from exhaustion. I have regularly made this suggestion to people with high-strung dogs that they thought they could help, but find that their lifestyle or housing situation did not accomodate the dog’s needs. It does not mean you don;t love her.. in fact it would mean that you are doing what’s best for her BECAUSE you love her.
Anyway, Hope this helps you feel better about what you are thinking. Yes, love is tauted as being love at all costs, but that is not true. When you have done all you can and tried everything in your power to help, sometimes finding another home is the best option for the dog. Again, this does not mean you love her less.
Hope to see you at Therese’s wedding!!!
Bonnie Hamilton
Thera,
Sux about the carpet. You should try oxyclean mixed with water on the stain. I was able to get up some nasty dog diahrea even after the carpet cleaners came and couldn’t get it up. As far a phizz goes, you have more patience that I would’ve. That dog has cost you way more than it should.
So sorry about the new carpet. It does look very pretty. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Your husband will appreciate all of your efforts whether there’s a stain on the new carpet or not. (Secretly he’ll be glad Phizz messed it up first.)
We have an old dog who poops and barfs on everything. He even pees on the kid toys. On purpose. J refuses to let him forever sleep so I keep him crated when we’re gone or he stays in rooms without carpet.
I also agree with Bonnie. Our lab needs a lot of exercise otherwise she’d eat the furniture and move on to the walls and flooring.
Bonnie has some good solid advice. I think if the question is, “Can I love Phizz despite her shittiness?” Then yes, I think you have the strength and ability to do that. However if the question is, “Should I keep Phizz because she’s not happy and she makes life miserable for everyone?” Then Bonnie is right, she needs a home that she could get the special kind of attention she needs.